thestar.com

Will it be TTC fares, creepycrawling up and springing free 20 cents higher than before? Setting all Toronto off on a frantic fruitless token scavenge? Even though The Sign, Sorry, No Token Rolls Available (with its unwritten subtext, the better to roll you in September) is on all the booths, trying to look hand-lettered as though they never meant to, it didn't occur to anybody there , it was as big a surprise to them as to you, and by the way, bozo, don't go hammering on the glass; it's shatterproof?

Or: Shall we examine Tim Hortons selling out to Wendy's, the spectacle of another great Canadian icon, one more priceless chocolate coconut cream-filled dutchie glazed cruller Timbit of our precious heritage, gone to Yankee burgerfat, ``(rounding) out the menus of the two chains by blending Tim Hortons morning meals and snacks with the strength enjoyed by Wendy's in lunches and dinners;'' burp; and nobody around to pass the Maalox?

No. All of these issues, pressing though they are, must take their places 'way down the ladder of social significance, in the face of the truly repugnant issue of the week, viz.: Sexism in Beauty And The Beast.